It’s Mother day in the UK on this Sunday (6th March). And just about two years and a week ago, I was still pregnant with a rather huge bump and only tossing and turning on the bed wondering when the bun was going to come out of the oven. I was excited, nervous and happy all at the same time. But when my bundle did come out, I was overwhelmed and didn’t have any words to express what I was feeling just like any new mother would’ve felt. Okay, so days passed by as we did the feed/change/nap routine for a good three months and by that time I felt I needed to get out more and see the world. And start sharing it with my little one too. So, slowly we progressed to taking walks and then going to grocery shopping and then sometimes for a quick meal outside too. Life was changing as everything I did was based on how it would affect the baby. And at the same time, I was longing to feel like a mother so badly but I was failing only because It was all so stressful and I never did much other feed and change for him. But as we got to the fourth month, something changed. Something good! Suddenly, I wasn’t feeling as tired as I used to feel and I was slowly starting to feel like a mother. I started to observe my baby more than I ever did. I still cannot forget the way he smiled at me around 4am one morning. The smile, where the eyes sparkle and that little face was filled with way too much love for me. That was when I decided, I was never going to feel stressed about being a new mother and would try my best to be in the moment with my baby. It surprised me that I started to feel so positive quite quickly and tried to enjoy every bit. Not that I was depressed and angry for the first 3 months but just that I didn’t really get a chance to feel anything else other than being tired.
So, now its been two years with my boy and I feel as if my life has changed for the best. I love being a mother. I do not think anything else can match this happiness ever. I may have missed being out all day without having to worry about cooking or cleaning. But all those memories look rather strange and boring. I find helping my little boy with his puzzles and cooking some fresh food much more interesting than being out and about like a pretty young woman.
Best of all, what this bundle that is two years old now has taught me is that the best kind of love is one where you put other’s need in front of your own. I may have learnt quite a bit with my husband too but this boy has taken it to new heights. Now, who would’ve thought these days I say that I do not want that banana cake and leave it out in the open??? And what’s even better is that I feel a sense of great acomplishment when I can happily watch my men eat. I may have not been so selfless before the baby but you see how much this motherhood can turn you upside down? Ok, I know it is not about just giving up good food or sleep but its about how much time you give. It’s about sacrificing your own interests for this little person whom you bought into this world and for whom you feel responsible. Which is why I spend all day playing and talking about what we do and what we saw at the park so we can come home and cuddle with daddy and tell him about what we did all day. Oh these are the kind of things that make me feel good. And I cannot be more thankful for being able to give so much time and feel better about it too.
Leaving you with a nice quote I came across this week on motherhood and also wishing you a very happy Mother’s day from us.